Save Our Pubs! New play at Belgrade show boozers are a lifeline.

Annette Kinsella
May 8
3 min read

Sean Kearns & Anthony Brophy - Two Pints. Photo by Nicola Young Photography.

Two Pints by Roddy Doyle. Directed by Sara Joyce, at the B2 Stage, Belgrade Theatre from 2 – 24 May.

Review by Annette Kinsella

Is there anything more British than a night out in the pub? Whether it’s a spit and sawdust gritty old boozer, a hipster-haunting microbrewery, or a neon-lit bottomless brunch bar, there’s nothing Brits like more than a sharing their woes or having a laugh over a pint and a packet of peanuts/ crisps/ pork scratchings delete as appropriate. For info, my personal favourite is the powdery fluorescent orange parcels of dusty deliciousness that are Scampi Fries. If you can get beyond the eye-wateringly noxious odour, that is.

Even literary heavyweight George Orwell published an essay on what makes a perfect pub (old fashioned Victoriana décor, friendly barmaids, a snack counter and a garden, if you’re interested). Pubs have been a mainstay of British – and Irish – culture for centuries.

Or at least, that’s how it used to be. Apparently since 2000, a quarter of all British pubs have closed, and there’s no sign of the decline abating, with the British Beer and Pub Association reporting that six pubs a week on average call last order for good. A combination of cheap supermarket booze, skyrocketing cost of living and changing drinking habits of the young have pushed the industry to breaking point.

Roddy Doyle’s Two Pints, currently at the Belgrade Theatre, is a poignant reminder of all we would lose if these institutions, once as synonymous to every city and village street as post boxes or lampposts, were to disappear forever.

Set in the heart of a Dublin boozer, the action follows two unnamed friends (Anthony Brophy and Sean Kearns) as they meet for their daily pints. Through Doyle’s razor-sharp dialogue, the pair discuss everything, from Nigella to football, together navigating the bumpy ground of friendship, aging and loss. The conversation turns on a sixpence between hilarity and tragedy, showcasing Commitments writer Doyle’s prowess in reflecting real male friendships.

With just one set and three characters – Brandan the barman (Steve Gunn) being the taciturn observer until the final moment – this play proves that showy staging or elaborate plot devices aren’t always required to make a huge impact. In the hands of skilled actors, the human experience, in its messy, sad and funny entirety, is enough to take centre stage.

Sean Kearns, Anthony Brophy and Steve Gunn - Two Pints. Photo by Nicola Young Photography.

My own checklist for the perfect pub:

Gloomy lighting – perfect for casting flattering shadows
Comfortable seats and lots of them
A miserable barman/maid – unusual one, but for me nothing says ‘comfortable boozer’ like a downturned gob behind the bar
Snugs and hidey-holes – think the Old Windmill or The Town Wall Tavern
An impressive array of real ale
A jukebox – again divisive, but I like to know about the musical peccadilloes of my fellow punters. I know it was you that put the Vengaboys on. And I applaud you.
An inexhaustible supply of Scampi Fries, ideally on tap