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The horrid Twits don't fool their young audience

The Twits, Albany Theatre, Earsldon, October 26 only

Mr and Mrs Twit are so disgusting they make upstarts like Wayne and Waynetta Slob look life toffs.

And so un-PC! When they are not insulting each other or playing nasty tricks to gain the upper hand, they do a spot of monkey rustling and try to shoot a few wild birds for the pot.

What sort of example it that to set by the youthful performers of the Five Star Theatre company?

Well, one that every young child who packed out the Albany knew instinctively was the complete opposite of what they should do but for a blissful hour the reins were off.

Rude noises blasting from Mr Twit's rear exhaust naturally got the loudest laughs. The Twits' shooting party with water rifles which spilled out into the audience was greeted with mock fright-delight (nothing they hadn't seen from grandads, I suspect)

Sing-alongs, of course, with shoes held over heads; lots of booing for Mr Twit, no sympathy for his dreadful wife either. The monkeys outsmarted the odious couple and were freed from a life of caged drudgery. Not a bird was shot.

The children, mostly under 10, happily filed out too smiling after an a hour of pretend naughtiness, happy that the good guys had won, the chimps beat the chumps.

Back in the real world that day the papers were carrying a story about an American woman, Larysa Switlyk, a so-called hunter, who had travelled to a Scottish island to shoot dead a magnificent wild goat.

Now that is scary and sadly it wasn't made up.

Winner!